“You have to die a few times before you can really live.” Charles Bukowski
In one of my previous articles, I have mentioned how the description of happiness affects our lives. Today, I’m going to talk about the sense of unhappiness.
It’s good to enjoy life and to love it. On the other hand, today, all over the world there is strong propaganda of happiness that will try to take away our freedom of being unhappy. Wilhelm Schmid, the author of ”Unhappiness: An Encouragement“, followed a very different point of view by bringing the question up “Does happiness always make you happy?”. The author argues that the event, which sparked the idea of seeking happiness, was the entry of “Every person has the right to seek happiness” into the American Declaration in 1776. According to the author, after that date, not only in America but in the whole world, the quest for happiness has become a fashion. He also added that some people interpret this clause as “every person has the right to be happy.” Think about this for a second; how can such a request be realized and by whom? Moreover, is it possible for us to be in the same mood all the time? In general, human emotions naturally has two-dimensions. There are feelings that we can describe as negative or unhappy in return for positive and happy feelings. This contrast adds meaning to emotions. Because of this nature of emotions, too much happiness can cause unhappiness. If you try to be happy all the time, you will examine your emotional states very often, and as a result you will probably start feeling unhappy.
Another question is, “Is our purpose in life just feeling happy?”. This is how precisely the feeling inside of many advertisements. Eating X-brand of chocolate or wearing Y-brand of clothing is the happiest thing in life… Is this the reality? Do we live our lives just to enjoy it or to buy something? If we live life just for fun, the slightest bit of pain can result in great suffering. I think it’s important to be positive in life. However, living life purely for happiness can have a harmful effect. First of all, you connect your happiness to a reason. For example, if happiness means a healthy life for you, the happiness you connected to health can turn into a week of unhappiness, even when you catch a cold. If your happiness is associated with money, which is one of the last trends around the world, then the economic crisis may make you so unhappy that you might not be able to stand up. If happiness for you depends on success, the slightest failure might make you miserable and your fear of failure after a while may preclude your wish to succeed and make you unable to move.
It’s best to accept the balance in life itself. Happiness is not always a joyous and cheerful state of contentment. Even in your most happy moments, there may be little unpleasant feelings, and if you look carefully in your most negative moments, you can see beautiful things in it. Instead of fighting with the sense of unhappiness, try to accept it as it is. Being unhappy is as natural as being happy. You will feel more peaceful when you accept your feelings as they are. In addition to that, you might notice that unhappiness might be the emotion that drives you into new pursuits and allows you to focus on beautifying your life.
K.